Sunday, 23 May 2010
"Stupid flamin' television. I don't see why I bother fixing it, someone keeps fricking breaking it and then I have to fricking fix it and I am just not fricking impressed."
Zeus whistles innocently in the background.
While FuryRed was happily fixing the television the brothers hopped to their sisters and taught them a trick or two on how to walk.
"And if a shark is chasing you, run very very fast."
Sadly no one had told Apollo that sharks don't have feet and can't go on land.
Hestia the Gozilla Child.
Helen the Major League Turtle.
After cursing her way through fixing the T.V. FuryRed eventually sat down and took out a book.
She read one like: "As he caressed her inner thigh, she bit her lip in anticipation..." Before looking up at her husband. She then looks back down at her book.
"Yes my lovely?"
"Why don't you follow me to the bedroom."
A while later Zeus ventured out of the bedroom. He wandered over to Hestia.
"Hello little girl. You may not know it but I'm your dad and this is the only interaction you will ever get from me."
Great parenting skills there Zeus.
Apollo and Hades snickered to themselves as their mother walked past with a stinky bag.
Athena skipped merrily along, since she is now free of her family.
Even though they bear a resemblance you can just see the annoyance each other whirring through their eyes.
"I hate this child, let me out of here."
"Apollo! Get the fuck out of here!"
"Sorry dude, I'm stuck the door."
After this Hades wanted to 'Ask Apollo To Leave Home'.
Er, I guess a day outing for them was in order.
"Where are you taking me Hades?"
"Oh, no where important."
"I'm sorry for earlier."
"I don't think mum would be impressed that you're getting all up in someone's grill."
"What the hell are you on about Ap? I'm just trying to get past and this weirdo is in my way."
"I can hear you boys you know."
"Oh pretty butterfly thou art so gay and...erm...basking in loveliness."
Apollo was so busy with the butterfly *facepalm* he didn't see where Hades had gone. So he assumed he has gone into the crypt.
"Er Hades, are you in here?"
Hades walks out of the crypt. Black to the bone. He shakes a little.
Suddenly he bursts out:
"Oh my god that was so totally sweet."
Who'd have thought being attacked by a bear would be so exciting.
"Holy minstrels. That was intense. HADES."
"Look Hades, I'm sorry I walked on you while you were having a sit down. Can I be forgiven now?"
"Good, now I'm going home."
"Spoilsport, I'm going to the park."
"Sure I have a crispy scent to me, maybe it will attract people."
"Don't look at the camera and no one will spot me here."
Er I wonder why Zeri was here...
"No one notice at all..."
Darn, I missed a protest with many simselves apparently. Haha. Or they're just gathering for free jello perhaps at the city hall?
I looked back towards the household and found Fury doing this in front of her child.
"And big bears come out of the crypt and go BLERGHHH."
Somehow I don't think scaring your child shitless is a good way to go for parenting Fury.
"Okay Apollo, you can remain calm now. You are back to normal. Look cool."
"Hey mum I'm home."
"Zeus hide the magazines!"
Fury turns around.
"I have something to tell you mum."
"What is that dear?"
"I found an amazing woman while I was in the park. She is amazing. I think she is the one."
"Oh that's wonderful Hades. Have you invited her round so I can measure her up to my expectations?"
"She should be here soon, I'm going to have a quick shower. She'll probably arrive while I'm in there."
"Shall I send her in if she arrives then?"
The doorbell rings and Fury excitedly answers it. She frowns.
"Oh Random, it's just you. Come inside! Hades has invited over his soon to be wife, want to have a spy on her?"
Random smirks and walks inside after Fury.
Hades walks out of the bathroom looking all cool.
"Hey Hades, do you remember my friend Random? Ignore the idiotic clothing. She's sane really."
Hades pulls Random into a very very very very long hug.
"Oh you have got to be kidding me."
"Mummy pissed off."
I am agreed with this Hestia.
Saturday, 15 May 2010
"If I stay very quiet, no one will notice what I'm wearing."
Too late for that Fury.
You're not meant to be able to hear me.
"I'm stuck in this stupid piece of fabric, yes fabric, not clothing. Since it couldn't even pass off as dental floss."
Someone got up on the wrong side of Zeus this morning.
"Why I oughta...oof."
FuryRed appears to be busy right now, please call after the beep.
Apparently giving birth out in the hallway is much easier.
"No, I just wanted attention from the maid. Besides her whinging from getting stuck outside the bathroom was doing my head in."
Well Fury's a cheerful thing today.
"I'm squeezing a very big thing out of a ve-"
Too much information Fury.
"A glowing baby!"
Well done Fury. However I'm still going to have to shoot you.
"What the fuck is that?"
That's Fury's other child. -.-'
Readers meet Helen and Hestia.
Erm...I can't quite remember which is which.
"You're a bad mother."
They're your children Fury.
Eventually after Fury popping out more brats her other goblins (I mean children) arrived home. And got firmly stuck outside the house.
"UGH, Sandi move your french arse!"
"I'm not actually French, that is just my surname."
"...whatever. You're in the way of me and food. Sadly this is a bad thing to be in the way of in reference to me."
VJ turns to Apollo.
"You're sister's hot."
"I'm just going to pretend I have cottonballs in my ears."
As the other offspring finally get inside, Athena talks straight past her newborn sister on the floor. Whereas Apollo picks her (I think it's Hestia) up.
"This so totally wasn't here before."
Apollo frowns and wiggles it a bit.
"MUM HAVE YOU BEEN STEALING CHILDREN AGAIN?"
"Oh Aphrodite, your nose is the most gorgeous specimen of noses I have ever seen on Earth."
"I know VJ, it comes in ever so useful for opening cans of beans."
"Wow, a hot girl and a nose to use as a kitchen tool. Amazing."
Apollo went in search of his mother in order to check she didn't steal the children.
"Mother, there is two extra children in this house. Have you been kidnapping again? You know I totally warned you about this."
"I gave birth to them, they're your sisters pleb. Also, you're swearing at me."
Fury sighs and cowers slightly from her own child.
"I'm a failure at motherhood Apollo. We're hardly friends. All I do is woohoo your father."
Apollo's eyes widen slightly and then he smirks.
"As much as I love you talking about your problems mum." Que a snicker. "I think you'll be just fine. And I'm trying to quickly erase the image you've put in my mind."
Aw bless. I think a round of applause is needed for Fury finally admitting her failure as a mother. *clap* Although, Apollo still loves her apparently.
Later in the night I lost every single sim in the household. They were missing. I'd only gone to get some crackers and butter.
"GO HADES. ROARRR."
"Y'know Aph, you shouldn't roar at your own brother. Freud would have a field day with that."
"Why are we eating cake? I don't recall any birthdays recently."
"Me neither Ap."
Needless to say the boys didn't realise that cake was about a week old.
Something wrong Aph?
"I feel neglected by my family."
I'm sure all your brothers and sisters feel the same. Why don't you talk to them?
"Like I can be arsed to associate myself with them!"
After the teenagers and Zeus had gone to work/school (although I think Zeus should be going to school tbh) Fury grew up the babies. Good going while everyone is not here.
"Thanks, when everyone is here we all get stuck so peace and quiet from the loonyness it is."
And here are the oh so pretty brats.
Helen grew into a nose and Hestia somehow grew out of her green skin and...
Wait a second! O.O
Wha...what is this?
Well yes I know it's a Hestia but but. Does anyone else recognise something?
Maybe this will ring some bells.
Could Hestia be the break of the ugly gene through the girls? I mean the abnormal gene...ahem.
Funnily enough Fury jumped on this kid as soon as she had grown up.
"Come to momma little Hestia."
Let's just say she was busy pounding some logic blocks and looking a bit mad at the same time.
And apparently this was 'the face that launched a thousand ships.'
When everyone got back from their working places the teenagers had a surprise in order for yours truly. Y'see the lot has been lagging like a drunk cow in a custard factory. So the teenagers were nice enough to grow up and cure certain problems.
After the teenagers had grown to their young adult and mature statuses their mother and father gathered all their children for a photo.
Left to right on the back. - Aphrodite, Hades, Apollo, Athena.
Left to right on the front - Hestia and Helen
The girls then decided on something extraordinary drastic, they hugged everyone (except for Zeus, he wasn't having any of it) and moved out. Just like that.
The most bizarre thing was after the girls had moved out Fury stood at a window and looked out of it for hours. o.o
Fury it's not as if they've moved out of town.
"They might since most of this family isn't even friends with them!"
Then you've got some work to do.