Thursday, 29 April 2010

Chapter 6 - A Day in the Life of Apollo.

My creator always said that when this happens, we have a problem. She decided to have a panic, after getting her hopes up so much from discovering the ability to play us again.

After having a squeeze on a stress ball she gathered us all together and piled us into a newly built house. She said that this would cure our glitchy problems of freezing every so often. I believed her.

Mummy grew big suddenly, I was quite shocked when I discovered this. But a new member to the family sounds cool. Like muffin cool, not cookie cool. I'm hoping for a baby sister. However, this is when the creator realised that moving us had not cured the problem. So she only had one option left. Move us to another neighbourhood.

And here we are now in Sunset Valley! The home of horrid premades and saucy minxes according to our creator. Dad said that we needed to have a family bonding time, I just rolled my eyes as every time we try Hades interrupts with his annoying xylophone playing. Curse brothers.

Although he is quite cute for a greeny with a vague hint of evil in his eyes. Pity he doesn't know which end of the stick to use.

With a new change of scenery and a whole new height of adventure in store for a new town. I had a change of clothes. A miracle right.

Perhaps one day we can go sailing. Sadly boats haven't been invented ever. Maybe they can become reality, I hear Earth has them now.

Mum and Dad are still gross. Mum says making out is one of the things my Dad is good at. I feel sorry for Hades, he just can't escape. Whereas I am free to roam wherever the panties I like.

Dad is skilling constantly for his job. I don't have the heart to tell him that staring at a board will magically move the pieces. He believes in some weird stuff.

Mum won't shut up sometimes. I can hear her whispering and giggling away down the phone. I wonder who she's talking to? I hope she's not trying to arrange me on a child date. Who needs one of those eh?

Most of the time I take solace in my painting. I've only just started but I feel like I was born to do this. These soft strokes on the paper. The swirls of colours. It just feels right.

Finally I was able to visit the place I most dreamed about. The art gallery. Mum and Dad wouldn't usually let me go by myself. But they were mentioning something called woohoo and bananas so I just got the hell outta there.

On the way through the park, two strange women approached me. I was rather scared, they were giving me weird looks and kept nudging each other saying 'that's him'. I ran home very quickly after that.

When I got home I found Mum trying to teach Hades to talk. It's a long hard trek but someone had to do it. How the grim reaper is something you want to learn is besides me though, must be Mum's warped brain acting out.

Paint, paint, paint. Gotta love some paint. If Sunset Valley was made of paint I'd slip and slide all over it. That sounds like fun.

Dad's trying to become a cook. I must admit his meals are pretty decent. Slightly on the crispy side though, I don't know whether Stu Surprise is meant to be like that...Mum wasn't impressed. Must be the hormones.

She says that Dad isn't very good at much. Only woohoo and kissing. I still don't know what this woohoo is. I don't think I want to find out either. Sounds pretty bad.

I think Dad tries very hard to be good though. He's constantly trying his best with Hades, maybe that's because he didn't seem to pay me much attention when I was young. He apologised and blamed simselves.

Just before I ended my adventurous day I decided to have some bonding time with my brother. He's very sweet and annoying.

But I love him.

Chapter 5 - Simselves be thy name. Crashing parties is thy game.

"Tralala, ignoring mean creator, pfft."
You're wearing pink My little girly founder
"You're patronising me, that is not nice. I am leaving!"
Oh fine, I take it back.
"Good, now give me a miliion quids."
Yehh sorry that motherlode cheat just doesn't work anymore..ahem..cough.

"Om nom nom nom."
Enjoying that Apollo?
"Mwy burfdway today?"
Indeed, you will spontaneously combust and painfully grow up.
-chuckles evilly-

I decided that because Zeus hadn't had anything to do with any of his children, except help make them. I th-
"Yeh baby!"
I thought I'd make him teach Apollo to talk.
"And this is how you say hot simselves. H-O-"
I feel that this was a bad idea.
"Fragging flippin' stupid TV."
I feel your pain Fury.

"Why aren't you a girl?"
Fury! You shouldn't say that to your second son!
"But I wanted a girl!"
*cue stomping of simself feet*
I'd feel sorry for Hades except he's evil, so I sense someday he will get his own back.

While Zeus was at work, Fury decided to plan a party. Big surprise.
"And bring her her her and her! Oh but nooo, not her. Pah!"
Nice Fury. And what on earth is that between your legs?
"Something you downloaded that looks weird."
..oh yeh blame the downloader. Tuhh.

"Anddd a 1 2 3,
Zeus and Fury sitting in a tre-"
Fury don't teach that to your infant! Sheesh!
-face palm-

Well done Zeus, you got promoted again! A very much needed promotion for...erm...some reason.
Erm, what?
"Simselves just walked by."
I despair.

"Hmm, I sense that this is a stove."
"Yah rly! And that pancakes have been cooked on it recently."
And why do you think that?
"It's boiling hot and burning my hand and I cooked pancakes earlier."

And finally the birthday party began! The double birthday party ;] I thought it would be funny for it to be a swimsuit party. But no. Some simselves decided to ignore me!
"Look into my eyeeeesss Apollo."
Sarah your scaring the child, and why have your eyes gone funny like dolphinz did?
"Sim food?"

Poor Hades. No one focused on his little cake.
Ruby was raiding the fridge.
"Oi get out of there Ruby!"
And every other simself was either teasing another or watching TV.
"Get out of my shower!"

Welcome little Hades to the world of communication!

Funnily enough, every single simself raced to the cake after Hades had grown up. No cheers, just cake.
"Hey Firestar that's my slice!"
"Nuhuh I dibbed it earlier."
"This isn't fair."
"I want a bigger slice..."

"Maybe, if I do it quietly. No one would notice this child disappearing. Muhahaha."
Ruby! Get that thought of your mind!
"Drat, foiled again."

"Ruby weird."
She was married to the Grim Reaper once and apparently he's hit the bucket.
...why am I telling this to a small child?
"Me nwo no."

Oh yeh cheer on the child which is getting closer to your age. Lousy simselves!
"They want my child don't they. They're going to take him away from me."
No they're not Fury, you'll keep an eye on them in the same household.
"Yack. That's disturbing."

"Creator? Why have you taken a picture of the back of my head?"
No reason. I'm keeping it from the audience.
"Wicked cruel."
I know right.
"Mmm I fancy a bit of green on toast."
"I swear I didn't say that out loud."
You don't need to. ;]

"Mwomma. Please don't leave me!"
"There there Hades. It's okay."
"The swimselves will get me!"
"No they won't, don't be silly."

"You will pay mortal being."

Pfft, seriously. Where is Zeus' nose? I don't see it anywhere!

Chapter 4 - Parties, Plans and Big Suprises!

This a baby. Baby say goo.
Agreed. Babies poop, eat and sleep. You shall not be seeing much of this child until its grown slightly.
Don't give me that Fury, it's a baby. It can't hear me.
"Well, techni-"
Nananana! -puts fingers in ears-
"Real mature Bitten."
That's creator to you.

"Fury how I have missed you."
"We were asleep. Lying next to each other."
"Shush, how's about we whisperwhisper."

*cue giggles*

Any reason you're in your underwear again Fury? nudgenudge
"Shove off. And why am I fixing this random dude's TV?"
Well, this random dude's TV (SimCrazy) will earn you cash. Which you are in dyer dyer need of.
Oh, no reason...

"How do I use this thing?"
You press the buttons for numbers. And hey presto, someone talks!
"Whoa really? They should make these devices worldwide so everyone can use them!"
-face palm- Zeus just be quiet and phone those simselves. I mean, phone...ugh...argh.
No, I just give up.
No idea.
"Great plan."

The waiting begins.
"What we waiting for?"
Ohhh nothing.
"I'm curious?"
Well you should know since you just used the phone.
"But I got distracted by Fury walking past in her underwear."

"Hi dude."
What the fudge?
"Hey man."
Who the hell is he?
"I'm a guest."
I don't remember you being invited!
"I'm the partner of one of the simselves."
Oh realllyyyy? Who?
"I can't remember."

Alert. Alert. Horde of simselves heading this way. Alert. Destroy!
"Bog off with that camera in my face."

"This party stinks."
You haven't even got inside yet.
"I can smell simselves from out here. I'm sniffling already. Where's my allergy tablets."
Well done on bringing food by the way.
"Well, i'm not stupid."

Small house + Lots of simselves = Trouble.
And apparently lots of staring.

Oi! What are you guys doing! This is a party, get on your feet and rock that bodies?
"Stop quoting Justin Timberlake."
"Yeh you just suck. Leave us alone."

Where on earth are you sticking your hands SimCrazy?!?
"Well, I decided to stick my left hand in, my left hand out. In out in out. I shake it all about."
You do the hokey cokey?
"What's the hokey cokey?"

What's wrong Fury?
"I think Jaybird is trying to steal my uber gorgeous husband from me."
"And he's performing to her every whim!"
First things first, shes his boss and second, gorgeous, really?
"Yes, beauty is in the eye of the beholder."
Are you blind?
So I've heard.

"I detect baby. Sarah detects male spawn."
Sarah! Stay away from the baby!
"Detect, detect."
Eeee, Fury run!

"Pahaha. Look at Clay!"
?? What's so funny.
"Pahaha! Him standing there, hilarious!"
..they've lost it. The simselves have lost it.

"I am not amused."
"Your comments on simselves."
Oh there there firey.
Ohh maybe firebug?
Now now! Keep it clean.
Good simself Is that your fist I see clenching there?

The next day after a rocking party.
"You cheated and made Fury have the Professional Host reward thingy."
"Yes ma'am."
Anyway, this is Zeus' second attempt at the medical career. Since he now has some logic points.
"I are getting smarter!"
Yes dear.

"Must keep cleaning. Must keep cleaning. Cleaning, cleaning, cleaning. Lalalalala!"
I'm glad you like the chores.
"I'm a neurotic sim. I like things all holy and wise."

"Yehh 7pm."
"Yup! Bring all twelve of yourselves."
I hate you.
"Love you too!" *skips off*
Why I oughta grumblegrumble.

Sigh. I'm just leaving you lot to it.
*cheers echo around the room*

Or not. Dolphinz? O.o;
"Must. have. blood."
Why...why are your eyes red? And, that's your formal wear?
Oh good god. I'd watch out Ruby.
"Nah, I'd keep her as my pet."
"Hot women."
Great input there Zeus.
"Must keep eyes averted by naughty areas in order to stay loyal to wife."

Poor Apollo. The only people paying attention to his birthday are his parents.
"Hand hand hand, evil hand!"
Yeh, I'm not impressed either Fury.
"Thanks. Are you watching carefully?"
Yup, let's whirl that bugga- I mean baby!

"Apwollo want wancakes."
Whoa, you look evil.
"Nwo, i'm grumpy and want wancakes."
Ahh I see. Wait a second...i'm having a conversation with a toddler. Not good.
Ahem. Anyway, makeover anyone?
"Psst weator. Why is that woman's body hanging out?"

Who the hell are you, and what have you done with the ugly gene?
"Hwe hwe."
Awwww =']

The party ended 4 hours ago and every sim inside the house is asleep.
"Whoa that party was good."
"The standing was epic."
"Did anyone get cake? Sabsy I saw you have two slices!"
Go home!!

"This cake taste funny."
It's from last night.
Hormones getting ya?
"Must be."
"I'll eat it honey if you don't want it."
Or maybe its just your gorgeous husband rubbing off on you.

You look quite chirpy considering you're going to work.
"Promotion, promotion, promotion!"
How would you know?
"Cause I iz psychic blood."
Never. Ever. Say that again. Seriously.

Ahem, so while Zeus was working (le gasp) I decided a mummy and son's day out was in order.
"Up Appy up!

Squeeee. I actually adore this child. But sadly his nose will probably burst when he grows up. Pahaha.

Now some of your may be thinking, does Zeus have any time for his child at all? And the answer is no. In actual fact, this is the first time Zeus willingly free willed to go interact with his child.
Shame on you Zeus!
"And this is a xylophone Apollo! Zyla..."
I'm glad the teaching career isn't available Zeus.

Problems with the pancake?
"I wanna make pancake, hungry! Butbut childbirth in way!"

-crickets chirp-

...CHILDBIRTH? Jiminy Crickets! Zeus would be at work wouldn't he. Tuh.

And with one final puff.
And one final ahh.
I said ahh.
The brave and evil Hades was born.

...does anyone else have the uncertain feeling that he knows he's being watched?